


Love Is An Online Status

by NaeSpark



Series: Crystalise Our Hearts [9]
Category: Frozen (2013)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-19
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-01-16 06:45:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1335889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaeSpark/pseuds/NaeSpark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>First chapter of a fairly long fanfiction foccusing on an alternate universe in which Elsa and Anna meet online by a random crossing of the strings of Fate.<br/>Ok. Maybe not so random.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which Creeps Are Dealt With

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to this wonderful adventure about to start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cover Art by http://maria9813.deviantart.com/art/Cover-Art-for-NaeSpark-449705549

__

_It’s time to become someone else._

 You sit at your desk with a small sigh, adjusting your computer mouse before turning on your laptop. As windows updates against your will, you absentmindedly sip on your cup of chocolate.

 You look over your shoulder to make sure no one is watching you - unnecessary, given that you are alone in your apartment-, and type down your password, logging in.

 After checking three new threads on your forum, you finally accept that you must deal with the single message laying ominously in your gmail inbox. You can nearly taste the hate mail, and that makes you cringe and exhale sharply. As much as you know you had every right and justification to do what you did, the insecurity is eating you alive. Gritting your teeth and counting to ten, you click on the icon flashing on your browser window.

 Bolded lettering signals a new email, seemingly harmless by title.

**RE: Ban Response by Auburn_Royalty_Hans      09/02/2014 (9:26pm)**

 Hans was a long-term forum follower, who occasionally caused trouble by posting dubious content and making less-than-appropriate remarks towards other members, namely those who had the misfortune of identifying themselves as female. As the administrator and founder of one of the biggest lesbian content-oriented forums on this side of the internet, you repeatedly warned him and threatened to ban him for his actions, only to be met with apologies and subtle tactics of manipulation. It was when his inappropriate remarks turned into reported harassment that you knew you had no choice other than to let him know he would be banned over the course of the next week.

 The conversation that followed the ban had been less than amicable.

**Auburn_Royalty_Hans              07/02/2014 (08:30am)**

_You can’t keep banning me._

_Im the biggest contributor for this website._

**_=============_ **

 

**SnowQueen                               07/02/2014 (10:47am)**

_Several users reported messages containing lewd content._

_Upon prompting you to stop (which you didn’t), such messages were re-sent to me, and confirmed within the website archive. The IP that sent these messages coincides with the one you registered under, so I don’t think there is any mistake here._

_This behavior is against forum rules._

_Your ban is entirely justified._

**==============**

 

**Auburn_Royalty_Hans                07/02/2014 (10:52am)**

_Thats ridiculous!!_

_I only sent those PMs because they lead me on._

_Believe me, they said worse stuff on skype._

_Theyre plotting against me._

_**==============**_

 

**SnowQueen                                 07/02/2014 (11:03am)**

_All 5 of them are conspiring against you? I find that a little too hard to believe._

_Also, the content you post on the NSFW thread is also gross and off-topic. That still constitutes ground for a ban._

**==============**

 

**Auburn_Royalty_Hans                 08/02/2014 (1:33pm)**

_I posted a pic of a girl getting off. Whats the big deal anyway._

_Its a yuri forum, youre supposed to enjoy that._

_Arent you lesbians into that kinda thing?_

**==============**

 

**SnowQueen                                 08/02/2014 (4:54pm)**

_As much as you’d like to state otherwise, a woman is not in a lesbian relationship with her vibrator, so posting something like that in a lesbian relationship thread is still painfully off-topic._

_Forum rules also state that excessively explicit material is to be put under a spoiler break._

_You’re very close to a permanent ban, Hans._

**==============**

 

That had been what had happened until that very point. Only his response remains unread in your inbox, and you face mixed feelings about it. Firstly, confrontation makes you nervous and self-conscious, no matter how righteous, and, secondly, you are sincerely hoping he turns into an absolute creep so that you can just ban him and let it go.

**[UNREAD]**

**Auburn_Royalty_Hans                  09/02/2014 (9:24pm)**

**_This is bullshit Admin! wtf now sex isnt allowed on a forum about SEXUAL stuff?_ **

**_I have to put up with your vanilla bullshit just because Im a guy? I s2g youre all girl faggots whove never seen a real dick in their lives_ **

…

 Yeah… You probably don’t need to read anything beyond that. You can’t avoid a small sigh of relief with the fact that your second hope was correct and you can finally ban Hans permanently. You’ve never liked him and you’ve never been able to shake away the uncomfortable creep-vibe practically radiating from your every interaction.

 Skimming through his death threats, you type out what you hope will be your last ever reply.

**SnowQueen**

_You have been permanently banned from my website._

_Your IP address has been noted, so be aware that I know your name and where you live. I will not hesitate to contact the authorities if I keep receiving notice of your harassment._

_Have a nice day._

 As you hit the “send” button rather triumphantly, you wonder if you went too far when you added the police remark. You remind yourself you could have easily hacked his computer and given him hell. But that wouldn’t be elegant, would it?

 You proceed with banning his account permanently on your forum, as well as blocking his email address.

 By the time you’re done, you are so emotionally drained and exhausted that you have to get up and make some more hot chocolate, letting it cool off as you try to take your mind off that unpleasant situation. You fiddle around with your Geometry homework, carefully drawing the shapes the teacher assigned to you, but finding that so easy that your mind keeps plaguing you with potentially anxious thoughts. Giving up and taking your sleeping medication, you barely notice that a user named **FreckledCutie** has registered themself on your forum.


	2. In Which A Cutie Is Introduced

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As user SnowQueen checks the forum she administrates, she notices that a new user FreckledCutie has joined and introduced themself.  
> The gears start to move as they reach out for anime advice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to keep the updates more or less on schedule, but I'm currently in college, and that might make things a little complicated.  
> www.naesnark.tumblr.com

 You wake up a little groggy and still tired, hitting the snooze button on your alarm clock as you decide if you should get up and go to class. Measuring the pros and cons of social interaction, you decide that the documentary on geometrical patterns in Nature is a big enough pro to force you out of bed.

 Finally taking the advice of one of your tumblr followers, you had braided your hair before going to bed, which avoided the horrifying bedhead that usually threatened to form dreadlocks on the back of your neck. Long hair is high-maintenance hair, but hearing someone say lesbians always wore their hair short had aggravated you enough to let it grow out. Besides, you're not out to your classmates, so discretion is advised.

 You brush your platinum curls, the familiar motion calming your nerves considerably.

 Slipping into a comfortable shirt and cardigan set, you proceed with adjusting the dark skirt that matches your leggings, before you leave for college with your hair neatly braided over your left shoulder. The morning air is fresh against your cheeks, and it makes you think you might actually have a good day.

***

 Your father isn't home when you arrive, so you fix something to eat before changing into your pajamas and sitting at your desk.

 You turn your laptop on hoping not to find any hate mail or spam in your inbox. Surprinsingly, there really is none, leaving you relaxed enough to log into your forum account. A quick chat with your moderators confirms that the threads are running smoothly and on-topic. It almost makes you wish you'd banned Hans sooner.

 You turn your attention to the new topic in the Introductions thread, clicking on it with a curious eyebrow-raise.

**'Hi! :D' by _FreckledCutie_ [UNREAD] 09/02/2014 (11:11pm)**

 The user's screenname doesn't peg them as a weaboo, which is rather unusual in the website, so you find yourself reading her post with interest.

 Her writing is cheerful and lighthearted, her obvious inexperience in forum-posting adding a certain charm to it. You smile without noticing, feeling the urge to pat her head and tell her she will do just fine.

**FreckledCutie**  09/02/2014 (11:11pm)

**[User]**

_Hey guys!  
_ _I don't really know what to say here but yeah here I am! I'm kinda new to this yuri thing, but I'm hoping we can be friends!!  
_ _Or not, I mean, it's not like you HAVE to talk to me or smh. I don't wanna screw this up.  
_ _I'm 18 and starting college (trying to become a nurse ewe), so I'm still figuring out how I'll have time to watch anime.  
_ _Nice to meet you all!! :3_

_**[Edit:]** BTW, my name is Anna!_

=====

 The name leaves your mouth very naturally, and you like it. Anna...

 Several greetings have already been posted, but you decide to greet her nevertheless. You write a reply, hoping she won't be just another user who only posts once and suddenly disappears.

**SnowQueen**  10/02/2014 (7:40pm)

**[Administrator]**

_Welcome, Anna.  
_ _I hope you enjoy yourself and become a regular poster.  
_ _If you have any issues or doubts, feel free to contact me. I will do my best to help. :)_

=====

 You wonder if the smiley is a little too much, but the tone of her post made it flow from your fingertips.

 The door clicks open and you jump, closing your browser window even though you don't have a reason to. After a soft knock on your door, your father lets himself in.

 "Can I sit here?" He points at your bed and you nod your consent. He looks exhausted, but still tries to sound cheerful whilst talking to you. "Hi, dear. It's been a while." There is a guilty pang in his eyes.

 "It's okay, dad." You smile gently. "This is routine, remember?"

 "I spends weeks away from you, Elsa..."

 "I'm not a child, dad. I can take care of myself." You wish he would take care of himself, though. There is small stubble under his moustache, and his hair is turning grey behind his ears. "I know you have to travel. Don't worry." He doesn't seem convinced. "Don't worry, dad. Really. You don't have to be sorry."

 He shakes his head with a small smile. "I'm a father." He gets up to kiss your forehead. "I always worry." As he leaves, you call him.

 "Dad?"

  "Hm?"

 "Please rest."

 "I have to." He seems apologetic. "I have another big trip, tomorrow."

 "Oh."

 Nodding softly, he leaves your room with light steps. You only relax and look back at your computer after the sharp beep of the microwave signals that he is feeding himself.

 When you check the forum again, not only do you have a " _Thanks Admin <3_" from FreckledCutie, you also have a question.

**FreckledCutie**  10/02/2014 (8:20pm)

**[User]**

_So I just finished a series called Yami to Boshi Hon no Tabibito and I was ~~very~~ a little disappointed.  
_ _Wow, I mean_ **[SPOILER]** _.  
_ _I didn't expect that. It hurt >.<  
_ _Does anyone have any suggestions to heal my heartbreak?_

=====

 Oh, she found YamiBo.

 Understanding her, you search your extensive library for something cute that would take her out of her shock.

 And you find just the thing.

**SnowQueen**  10/02/2014 (8:32pm)

**[Administrator]**

_I feel your pain.  
_ _I think you would like a short series called Candy Boy. It's short (7+1 episodes and 2EX), but it's really really sweet and fluffy.  
_ _It has incestuous themes, but I assume that is not an issue._

=====

Satisfied with your suggestion, you log off and browse tumblr until it's time for you to sleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was simultaneously fun and complicated to write. My main goal here is to keep the reader curious and not throw them off with the online interactions. Hopefully I can convey the online dialogue well enough.  
> Would you look at that? PLOT HINTS? Wow, I'm amazed.  
> I advise you to watch Candy Boy, though.


	3. In Which The Anime List Updates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New anime is found, old anime is watched.  
> It begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pardon my delay! I hope you enjoy this chapter.

  Your lesbian senses have been tingling for weeks.

  You have been way too busy and anxious to find time to catch up with the latest yuri anime, but you are currently not drowning in essays, rushing home after your Art History class to watch the latest ongoing shoujo-ai. Sakura Trick seems fluffy enough for your tastes and the plotline of "highschool girls kissing", albeit a little overdone, is exactly what you need to calm your nerves.

  You sit at your desk with your legs crossed and a bowl of cereal in your left hand, raising the volume of your computer speakers. Everything is ready for anime.

  After nine episodes of gross laughter and unladylike squealing, you sigh onto your pillow and smile. Girls are nice. You really like girls.

  Facepalming at your own gayness, you spoon the rest of your milk and tidy your desk. You put the bowl in the dishwasher and notice that your father left you a message on the kitchen counter.

 

**I left you a gift on the kitchen table. I know you eat in your room, so you must have missed it.**

      **Love, Dad**

 

  You raise your eyebrows and head to the living room, grinning at the sight of a huge package. You open it eagerly, letting the scent fill your nostrils as you reveal a chocolate-covered cake that looks absolutely delicious.

  You fetch a knife and cut a large slice for yourself, sinking your teeth in it with a content sigh. You cut an extra slice and head to your computer, where a forum reply awaits.

 

**FreckledCutie** 14/02/2014 (7:03pm)

**[User]**

_Oh my gooooooosh, Admin <333 _

_Candy Boy is amazing. I'm dying, bury me in chocolate and cutie twin sisters!_

_I love how their love is totally blessed? I mean, that church scene?? It reminds me of how my mom once told me that twins are born together because they marry in Heaven. I don't remember all that well and mom isn't around that much._

_Shoot, I'm off-topic!_

_Thank you very much for suggesting this to me. You saved my heart and made my entire week!_

=====

 

  Her enthusiasm makes you smile softly, feeling the nostalgia that comes from the memory of watching CB for the first time. At some point, you had thought about piercing your ear to replay the events of the anime, but eventually gave up, lacking someone to go "full Candy Boy" with.

 

**SnowQueen** 15/02/2014 (9:19pm)

**[Administrator]**

_I'm glad you enjoyed it. Candy Boy is one of my personal favourites and it always warms my heart._

_I assume you started with the classics (Kannazuki no Miko, Strawberry Panic!, etc), if not, get on with it!_

=====

 

  Posting your reply, you quickly search Youtube and Wikipedia for information and trailers to add to the new Sakura Trick post you are making on the AnimeList thread. You briefly explain the plot and characters and add your personal considerations and fangirl moments. You finish with "I can't wait for more updates!" and publish it.

  By then, you have a Private Message in your forum inbox, which you are cautious to open. You're shocked to see that the message is from FreckledCutie. Ever since she had registered, a week before, you had been interacting on a daily basis, seemingly "getting along", as far as forum relations go. She isn't the type to start fights, and you are not one to encourage them.

  In fact, you actively avoid confrontation, which is why receiving a PM out of the blue makes you nervous.

 

**FreckledCutie [UNREAD] 15/02/2014 (9:35pm)**

_Hello, Admin_

_I know this is weird but out of everyone on the forum I thought maybe we could be friends? You seem really nice and really care about the forum._

_Thank you so much for your advice!_

 

  You're not used to being contacted in such a casual manner, eyeing your screen a little frightfully. Inhaling, you shake away your paranoia and decide to reply.

 

**SnowQueen 15/02/2014 (9:38pm)**

_Hi FreckledCutie_

_I think I'd have to get to know you a little better, because you can't just become close to someone you've just met, right?_

_But I'm not opposed. Let's keep in touch._

 

  Yawning, you check your Sakura Trick thread, verifying that FreckledCutie has already replied to it, apparently squealing over Kotone and wishing she had her demeanor.

  You exchange a couple of posts with her before going to bed, having a distinct feeling that you want to know her better.

 

***

 

**Anna Banana:** Admin Admin Admin!!

**Anna Banana:** The new Sakura Trick episode is out!

**SnowQueen:** Huh? But isn't it a little early for that?

 

It's Saturday morning and you return from your shower to find new notifications on Skype. After days of PMing Anna back and forth, you decided to supply her with your personal contact, a decision which you do not regret at all.

 

**Anna Banana:** The raws are out!

 

Anna's skype picture is a picture of herself, and you were flustered to find that Freckled Cutie was actually a very accurate description of her. The tanktop she wore revealed light freckles that covered her cheekbones and shoulders, and long strawberry-blonde hair, parted in two braids, framed her round face and accented her bright smile. Her eyes are blue-ish teal, but the photo is too small for you to be sure of it.

 

**SnowQueen:** No, thanks. I'd rather wait for an episode I can actually understand.

**Anna Banana:** Nghhhh~

**Anna Banana:** But Im too excited!

**Anna Banana:** Ok you know what, I will wait

**Anna Banana:** HOWEVER

**SnowQueen:** Oh dear

**Anna Banana:** I will wait if you let me stream the episode and watch it with me!

**Anna Banana:** >:D

 

  Anime has always been something you enjoyed alone. You never really had anyone to enjoy it with.

 

**SnowQueen:** We have a deal.


	4. In Which Shyness Ensues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two begin talking and knowing each other.

**Anna Banana:** I wish KiGo was canon...

 **SnowQueen:** Haha, I know, right?

 **SnowQueen:** Also, hello :)

 

  You sip on your chocolate while getting dressed, answering Anna on Skype mobile.

 

 **Anna Banana:** Oops XP

 **Anna Banana:** Hi Queen! I didnt mean to be rude.

 **Anna Banana:** Sorry  >.<

 **SnowQueen:** It's okay.

 **SnowQueen:** KiGo is great, though. They have fantastic chemistry.

 **SnowQueen:** And tons of vibrant sexual tension.

 **Anna Banana:** Tell me about it.

 **Anna Banana:** Im waiting for the episode where Shego pins KP down and totally loses it.

 **SnowQueen:** And Ron just watches.

 **Anna Banana:** Awkwardly hiding his boner.

 **SnowQueen:** Ah, yes, men and their fascination with all things lesbian.

 **Anna Banana:** *hiss*

 **SnowQueen:** Sigh

 **Anna Banana:** I will never understand.

 **SnowQueen:** Well, there is a reasonable similarity with yaoi fangirls.

 **Anna Banana:** No, that’s just you being nice. Lesbian stuff for guys is downright gross.

 

  Putting on your boots, you exhale loudly, making a mental list of all the issues regarding lesbian material made to please the cishet male population.

 

 **Anna Banana:** *junior high flashbacks*

 **SnowQueen:** ?

 **Anna Banana:** I used to be a yaoi fangirl.

 **SnowQueen:** Oh you poor soul.

 **Anna Banana:** It was a phase!

 **Anna Banana:** I used to think I was straight, too.

 **SnowQueen:** *snicker*

 **Anna Banana:** Oh shoosh

 **Anna Banana:** Miss Snow Queer

 **Anna Banana:** Its a totally normal thing to think!

 **Anna Banana:** Society and friends and family keep pushing us into this little box and expecting us to fit inside it, when, surprise!, we dont! Plus we dont really grow up thinking theres anything else we can be.

 **Anna Banana:** When I found out lesbians existed I was like

 **Anna Banana:** OH

 **Anna Banana:** THAT MAKES A LOT OF SENSE

 **Anna Banana:** I kinda tried kissing my cousin to check, but she freaked out on me.

 **SnowQueen:** You tried to kiss your cousin?

 **Anna Banana:** Yeah………

 **Anna Banana:** I mean, shes not a homophobe, but I admit it mightve been a little sudden.

 **Anna Banana:** A little.

 **SnowQueen:** Oh, goodness gracious, that’s actually hilarious.

 **Anna Banana:** Dont even get me started. Let me tell you about how my best friend Kristoff tried to kiss me and I shoved him into the canal.

 **SnowQueen:** …

 **SnowQueen:** You pushed a boy into the river.

 **Anna Banana:** Yup

 **Anna Banana:** We were 12.

 **SnowQueen:** You just keep getting better and better.

 **Anna Banana:** Really?

 **Anna Banana:** Oh jeez nvm

 **SnowQueen:**  Really.

 **Anna Banana:** It was a dumb que-

 **Anna Banana:** Oh

 **Anna Banana:** I think youre pretty great too.

 **Anna Banana:** I mean, youre really kind and smart… Brilliant, really!

 **Anna Banana:** Im so glad I joined your forum and got to meet you, because youve already become one of my best friends. Its crazy!

 

  You bite your lip and fiddle nervously with your braid. Taking a deep breath, you get up and start pacing the floor, grinning widely. Your phone is still in your hand, but you don’t quite know what to do with it.

  Your cheeks are burning, and you want to flail around, but your dignity forces back down and you recover your composure.

  You’ve never had a friend. You’re not even sure you know how friendship works. All you know is that you care a whole lot about Anna and that she also seems to care a lot about you.

  You’ve always been the lonely type. Knowing your father was busy at work made you grow up rather quickly, not wanting to burden him. Becoming the best daughter you could  possibly be - to compensate for your mother's loss - took most of your time, and it also didn’t help that you shied away from social gatherings. You don’t hate people, but there’s definitely too many people everywhere.

  You finally look back at your screen.

 

 **Anna Banana:** Queen?

 **Anna Banana:** Oh no. Did I scare you away?

 **Anna Banana:** Im so sorry I DIDNT MEAN TO BE CLINGY

 **Anna Banana:** I totally hecked up

 **Anna Banana:** Its ok, it doesnt have to be mutual or anything

 **Anna Banana:** Queen?

 

 Oh. You didn’t mean you leave her hanging.

 

 **SnowQueen:**  It’s mutual.

 **SnowQueen:** And you can call me Elsa.

 

***

 

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** I am so friggin excited!!!

 **SnowQueen:** Goodness, it’s not a big deal.

 

 Truth be told, you are as excited as she is. You had told her your name, the week before, so it made sense that you would show yourself to her.

 You don’t ever take pictures of yourself, but that was solved when Anna suggested a skype call. Even though the idea made you nervous, you had decided to face your fears and trust her.

 You had dressed up with your bed blue turtleneck and neatly braided your hair. You make sure your makeup is spotless and reply.

 

 **SnowQueen:** Okay. I’m ready.

 

  You click the call button and take a deep breath, sitting up straight with your hand folded on your lap. You fail to hide a smile when she picks up. Neither of you are on cam yet, but you can hear her breathe on the other side.

  When she speaks, you giggle.

  “Okay. Wow, this is nerve racking.”

   Her voice is clear and singsong, and you find it pleasant right away.

  “Heh, it’s okay. I’m quite nervous as well.”

  “Oh my GOSH, Elsa. Your voice is so pretty!”

  “Oh. Uhm. Really?”

  “Yes!” You can almost hear her smiling. “It’s so soft and gentle, and it makes me relax and want to listen to you reading a book until I fall asleep!” She gasps. “Christ, that was creepy as hell, I’m sorry!”

  You hide your blush with your sleeve, feeling silly when you remember that she can’t see you yet.

  “Your voice is really beautiful…” You whisper, just loud enough for her to hear you.

  There is a small squeal on the other side of the call, followed by a resolute grunt and a sigh. Your screen lights up to reveal the cutest girl you have ever laid eyes upon, and she is smiling shily at you, rubbing the back of her head.

  You observe her for a moment before turning your webcam on. You grin and her ribcage relaxes.

  “Hi Elsa.”

  “Hi Anna.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guysssssss, my wonderful friend made cover art for this fanfiction, please be sure to check it out on Chapter 1!


	5. In Which Feelings Blossom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As their first webcam encounter proceeds smoothly, there is really nothing to do but enjoy the moment.

  Anna is sitting up painfully straight, uncomfortably pressing her hands on her lap and trying to look mature and proper.

  Needless to say, she is failing quite hard and, instead, succeeding at being downright adorable.

  You shift in your seat.

  “You can sit like a regular person, you know?” You chuckle, hoping to reassure her. “That will give you a back ache.”

  She lays back, but still keeps her hands on her lap. “A-ah, oops.” Shifting to get comfortable, she chuckles nervously. “You just look so elegant and well-mannered that I felt… clumsy? Unfitting?”

  You blink. “What? Not at all, you’re fine.” You bite your lip, not knowing how to reply to the compliment. “But thank you. For thinking those good things about me.”

  She looks genuinely relieved.

  “We’re friends.” You smile gently, swallowing the nerves of actually saying it out loud. “There’s no reason to worry, right?”

  Her face lights up. “Definitely!”

  You decide to take a look at her surroundings. Her room is well lit and the walls are covered in mixed anime and Paramore posters. Her shelves contain assorted book collections, and a Pikachu plushie occupies the centre of her bed. Anna, herself, is wearing a Nightwish t-shirt under a red flannel, and there’s really nothing else you can see, as her bottom half is covered by a beige desk. She is hunched over and poking at a K-On! figurine.

  You don’t know what to talk about and that begins to stress you immensely. You seem to get along perfectly when typing, but speaking aloud is a different matter, and it isn’t too far-fetched to assume that you will say the wrong thing, irritate her, hide under your bed, and die. Truth be told, you are perfectly capable of small talk, but you think Anna deserves better than that from you.

 “Do you have figurines too?” She tries to grin wider when she questions you. Bless her for the topic.

  “Yes!” You’re quick to reply. “Uh, yes. I have a few that I bought online.”

  “Oh? I just bought mine at Cons.”

  You cringe at the word and memories associated with it. You don’t see the point of going to cons if you can just buy cheaper things online. You figure that Cons would probably be tolerable if you had someone to go with, rather than tagging along with some classmates and freaking out at the amount of people invading your personal space.

  “Cons…” You mutter quietly.

  “Elsa?”

  Anna’s voice awakens you from your trance, and you stutter an apology, explaining your reaction. Your friend listens with a questioning look, but does not interrupt you.

  “You don’t do well with people, do you?”

  You cringe again, hoping to avoid a detailed explanation regarding the difference between being an introvert and being “antisocial” - you’re not a sociopath just yet-, however, your companion surprises you once more.

  “I get it.” She smiles. “People tire me a lot. And, honestly,” She grimaces. “They usually smell.”

  You giggle in relief, covering your mouth.

  “Free health care should include deodorant.”

  “Amen, sister.”

  “So much progress, so little hygiene.” As you roll your eyes playfully, Anna holds onto her stomach and laughs. Her cheeks acquire a soft shade of pink, making her freckles stand out. Your smile softens and you thank the gods for having earned someone you could be so comfortable with.

  “I’m sure people can be pleasant to be around.” You wrap your arms around yourself. “I just haven’t found the right people.” You raise your chin and your eyes meet. “Not nearby, at least.”

  She flashes you a smile. “Yeah, I really get what you mean.”

 

***

 

  You barely notice as you assume the posture of an infatuated teenager and let yourself fall in bed with a blissful smile.

  You look at your phone once more.

 

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Goodnight!  <3

 

 You fall asleep with your phone by your head and a relaxed smile like you haven’t had in months.

 

***

 

 You wake up to the sound of someone fumbling through the kitchen cabinet, and you leap out of bed to greet your father.

  You find him humming as he sets two plates on the table and pulls out a handful of eggs from the refrigerator.

  “Morning, Elsa!”

  “Hi, dad.” You tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “I didn’t expect you here so early. Weren’t you working until the 20th?” Startled, you check your phone. “Did I mistake the date?”

  The tall man shakes his head, serving you a waffle and sitting down with his own scrambled eggs.

  “No, sweetheart, you got the date right.” He fiddles with his food, suddenly quiet. There is a hint of concern in his expression as his lips press together.

  You try to eat as you normally would, hoping to calm him down, but you give up. You sit up and reach for his hand. “Dad, did something happen?”

  He squeezes your hand. “Yes, but it’s nothing bad.” He smiles gently. “It’s just something we need to talk about. And I understand if you’re not too happy about it.” You raise an eyebrow. “I’m sure you will adjust to it in due time, but I’m still worried.”

  “Dad.”

  “All right.” He sighs. “I… I found someone. At work. We get along. Very well.”

  You’re surprised to hear this. You and your father have been alone for as far as you can remember, your mother having passed away shortly after your birth. Your parents had conceived you when they were young and things had not worked out. Your father didn’t grieve for too long, but you had never seen him having social interests of any sort. Of course you assumed that he had a social and possibly romantic/sexual life outside the house, in his trips, but for him to mention it at home… it had to be something big.

  “I hope you’re not angry at me. Or jealous.”

  “Dad, no.” You shake your head violently. “I’m not! I’m just surprised? It’s really unexpected. You never really talk about dating.”

  He looks away. “Well, I assumed it wasn’t really the kind of business you would like to hear about.” He looks a little frightened. “I know this is new for you, and it’s new for me, so I don’t want anything to be sore between us? Kids don’t usually react well to remarriages.”

  He is tapping on the floor with his foot, trying to seem as calm and collected as he can, but you can see that he is nervous. He has always been a gentle man and, albeit geographically distant, he has always been a comforting and familiar figure. You figure he is afraid that you will love him any less, that you will hold against him having another person sharing his attention, and, whilst you’re still a little shocked by the news, it’s really not the case.

  “Dad, you’re a grown man. I’m a grown woman now, too. I love you, but I know you need a different kind of love and care that I can’t give you. If you think you found a partner in your life… then I’ll welcome them. I’m quiet and socially awkward, but I think I can be a decent stepdaughter.”

  You feel his arms pulling you to a tight hug. “You silly child.”

  As you prepare your things to go to school, you hear your father talk about his newfound dream woman.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay.  
> Depression is a thing and sometimes I really can't find the will to write. I spent my summer trying to unstress and chill out. I hope I can update this more often.
> 
> PS: Regarding the differences between being introverted and being antisocial, here's a thing:  
>  \- People who are introverted tend to be inward turning, or focused more on internal thoughts, feelings and moods rather than seeking out external stimulation.  
>  \- Antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of empathy or remorse and a pervasive pattern of disregard for, or violation of, the rights of others.


	6. In Which Anxiety Strikes Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How does one learn how to deal with friendship?

**Anna The Chocolatier:** Whoa stuff really… developed.

 **SnowQueen:** You have an interesting way of phrasing things.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** “Everything just happens so much”

 **SnowQueen:** Nerd.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** XP

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** But really

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** How are you feeling?

 You barely pause to think, before typing.

**SnowQueen:** I’m all right.

 **SnowQueen:** I mean, it’s not a big deal.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Well, sometimes stuff gets to us and it doesnt matter if its a big deal or not

 **SnowQueen:** Well, I will deal. You don’t have to worry. I’m not even sure of why I told you about this.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Because you needed to

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** We’re friends

 You lean back. You still don’t know what to do. You feel uncomfortable talking about yourself. You’re sure Anna has other things to be worrying about. After all, she has school, and you know she has some friends in-real-life.

**Anna The Chocolatier:** Sweetie

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** You can talk okay?

 You look out the window before shutting your eyes and letting your fingers tap quickly on the keys.

**SnowQueen:** I don’t like changes. I’m used to things being a certain way and I don’t like the thought of new perspectives. I don’t want Dad to get hurt. I don’t want my space invaded.

 **SnowQueen:** I’m not sad or angry. I’m happy for him. I’m just nervous.

 **SnowQueen:** Really nervous and a little scared. Confused.

 You did it. You wrote it down and now you’re bracing for impact. You’re being childish, and you’re sure she won’t let that slide.

**Anna The Chocolatier:** Okay

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Why are you scared?

 **SnowQueen:** I’m not sure.

 **SnowQueen:** If someone else comes here, what will my chores be? I’m used to doing everything on my own. If they have children, where will they stay?

 **SnowQueen:** Besides, you know I’m not a people person. I’m introverted and quiet. I don’t know how to react around other people aside from being overly polite.

 **SnowQueen:** I stay at home writing reviews for Morinaga Milk manga or Akuma no Riddle episodes.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Thats what youre worried about? youre not jealous?

 **SnowQueen:** Why would I be?

 **SnowQueen:** Sure, I’m probably subconsciously jealous, but I know I have no reason to be.

 **SnowQueen:** I just don’t want to let Father down.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Elsa.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** You’re kind, polite, smart, and beautiful.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** You’re not petty or jealous.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** You’ll be fine.

 You look at your screen. She seems so positive that you want to believe her. She even bothered to write in full-on grammar, to catch your attention.

 But you know she is too kind. She doesn’t know you.

**SnowQueen:** Maybe I should just move to a dorm. Let him be happy.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Elsa, he wont be happy to see you go away

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Youre just scared and want to go away. People want you around. Really.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Please dont put yourself down.

 You press your lips together, and rotate your ring on your finger. It had been a gift from your father, a double-layered ring, which you could rotate when anxious. “You told me you got nervous when you take tests.” he had said “A coworker said it helped his daughter a lot.”

**SnowQueen:** I’m fine. I just need to sleep.

You swallow your sleeping pill.

**Anna The Chocolatier:** Oh ok

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Tell me if you need anything

 Too kind.

**SnowQueen:** Thanks.

 You shut down your computer.

***

 You wake up too early in the morning for a Saturday, burying your face in the pillow. You don’t want to get up, but you doubt you’ll be able to go back to sleep. You cover yourself more, peeking out of your blankets when you hear your phone buzz.

 You know it would be perfectly legitimate to ignore it and turn around, but you dislike keeping people waiting. You pick up the phone and answer your father’s text, telling him not to worry about lunch.

 Your conscience is a little heavy as you look at the skype icon on the bottom of your screen, and you curse your anxiety for ruining your interactions with people every time you feel stressed.

 Sitting up and fixing your bedhead, you open skype and mentally make a list of all the things you need to apologise for.

**SnowQueen:** Good morning… I’d like to apologise for my sudden departure, last night. It was rude.  
 You were just trying to help, but I got too stressed out and needed to leave. I hope you can understand that.  
 I am SO sorry you had to listen to my rant. I don’t know what came over me, unloading all that on you. I’m so used to being isolated that I start talking too much when I have someone.

 You lay back in bed (as if sitting up had helped you think), and hope Anna will not give you a hard tome. The rational part of you knows Anna is too caring for that, but your anxious self seems to think otherwise.

**Anna The Chocolatier:** Dont be silly.

 Oh, she’s awake.

**Anna The Chocolatier:** You were feeling bad and needed to go. Its okay.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Besides, I told you to talk. Its easier to solve stuff if you share your troubles.

 Your chest hurts.

**SnowQueen:** I don’t know how to share.

 You want to share. You want to trust her and cling. You want to feel a little less alone; a little less sad. Anna is a wonderful friend, and you know she genuinely cares about you.

**It’s too late. You’re already attached to her.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been having terrible computer issues and I am so sorry for that.  
> I am here, now. Hopefully this will become regular, but I really cannot promise anything.


	7. In Which You Realise What's Going On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just another regular day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warning:  
> \- Domestic abuse  
> \- Alcoholism

  You still have a hard time believing it. Even when she smiles at you through the webcam. She is real. You have a friend, now.

  A best friend. Someone you can talk to.

  The idea almost seems alien to you; you’re so used to being alone that having someone desire your company sounds, to say the least, unlikely. You’ve always been so quiet and diligent at school that people wouldn’t generally speak to you, and after being made fun of in primary school, the idea of social interaction gradually became less important. Only winter seemed to lighten your spirit, and the feeling of snow falling on your face was your personal definition of happiness. Perhaps it was snow that sparked your interest in fractals, which fascinated you to no end. Something as simple as a pattern repeating infinitely could create beautiful shapes, symmetrical and pleasing to the eye. Called the “pictures of chaos”, the visual depiction of how the tiniest of things can have the most amazing effects.

  You yawn as you open the door to your apartment, turning the lights on and closing it behind you. You put your bag down, heavy enough to make your shoulders ache slightly, and head for the kitchen, where white chocolate brownies await you. Preparing some iced coffee and re-reading a couple of school notes, the afternoon is quiet enough for you to relax, before heading to your room and watching the last couple of episodes of Akuma no Riddle.

  As the last episode ends, your computer flashes with the notification of a skype call, which you answer with a smile.

  “Hey!”

  “Elsa, are you okay? Were you crying?” A very distressed Anna greets you on the screen.

  “Oh, no, no, I’m fine!” You laugh and clean your eyes. “I just finished watching a series, that’s all.”

  Anna’s eyebrows raise and she giggles. “Oh, you’re one of _those_.” She grins. “You cry watching things.”

  “Shhhhh.” You cover the webcam with one hand playfully, as you laugh. “Unexpected plot twists get to me.”

  She settles in a smile and sits comfortably. “So, what did you finish watching?”

  “Akuma no Riddle.”

  “Oh, I see why you’re crying, now. Aww.” She eyes you sweetly. “I’m not surprised, though. You have a really sensitive streak. It’s really obvious”

  “The pains of dramatic lesbians have shaped me into being who I am.”

  “Tragic.”

  “Tragic lesbians needs to stop being a trope, though. I mean, it’s like they don’t think there is any other way to appeal to the public. Either you emotionally maim them so that the public sympathises, or you sexualise them so much that you know it’s all for the male gaze.” You huff.

  “Why appeal to the male gaze when you can appeal to the _female gays_?” Her eyebrows waggle.

  “See? Now that makes a lot more sense.” You snicker. “You’d think their target audience would be the one they depicted.”

  “Nope.” She crossed her arms. “We get half-assed representation in which we’re all sweet and tender and one of us dies. That or confused bisexuals who haven’t met the right guy and are there to make the main character fantasize.”

  “Ughhh.” You fall back in your chair and sip on your coffee; as you’re about to say something, the sound of screaming cuts you off. You turn your head to try to figure out where it comes from. You’re horrified to realise it comes from your speakers. You slowly face your monitor to see a wide eyed Anna being pushed out of the computer by a large figure yelling something you cannot comprehend. You can’t see faces, but you see Anna being held up by her collar, in silence, and receiving a punch to the side. You realise the person is mumbling in english, slurring as if drunk. Anna remains quiet the entire time, before the figure lets her go and turns away. You hear the door to Anna’s room slamming loudly.

  You’re speechless. Your friend is making a visible effort to sit down on her chair, and her eyes don’t show their usual glee when they face you. You’re frozen in place.

  “I’m sorry…” She whispers, holding on to her stomach.

  “I-it’s okay.” _No, this is not okay, what just happened?_ “Please, don’t talk, just breathe until the pain subsides…”

  “Yeah yeah, I know…” She flashes a pained smile and you realise it’s not the first time this had happened.

  “I-it’s okay, I’m here, okay?” You’re shaking. “I’m not going to hurt you, you’re my friend.”

  She tears up and manages another (more sincere) smile. “Thanks. I think I need to go, now, though.”

  “Okay…”

  “Goodnight, Elsa.”


	8. In Which They Are Under Freya's Watchful Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elsa is really at shock with everything that happened before her eyes, and the thing that hurts her the most is that she is too far away to give her friend a hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, man! Someone made fan art! http://bubsdoodles.tumblr.com/post/120121323981/i-made-elsa-anna-portraits-inspired-by 
> 
> Please be sure to drop by and offer them notes!

  You didn’t sleep that night. You didn’t even have breakfast. You pulled yourself through every class and arrived home at 5 p.m., still too nauseated to eat. You’re now sitting in front of your computer, looking at a blank skype window. You take a deep breath.

**SnowQueen:** Anna?

  You don’t know what to do. Seeing your best friend being punched in the gut by a faceless drunken figure had been the last thing you ever expected to see. Abuse was something you weren’t particularly familiar with, even though you knew a couple of online acquaintances who suffered from it.

**Anna The Chocolatier:** Oh hey!

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** What up

  Her mood confuses you and your anxiety spikes. Had you imagined it all? You want to help her and sit down with her, maybe share some food (that’s what friends do, right?), and tell her she will be all right. You wonder if she put ice where she got punched, and worry whether something else had happened during the night.

**SnowQueen:** Anna, are you okay?

 **SnowQueen:** I mean, because of yesterday

 **SnowQueen:** Yesterday happened.

_Anna The Chocolatier is typing…_

**Anna The Chocolatier:** Yeah thats not exactly how I imagined you would meet my brother.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** I was hoping you wouldnt have to meet him at all. Hes not friendly when hes drunk.

 **SnowQueen:** Is he ever friendly?

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Whenever other people are around.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Mom doesnt know he hits me. He makes sure. He hits where no one can see.

 **SnowQueen:** Why don’t you tell her?

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** I cant. I really cant. He will be mad.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Very mad.

 **SnowQueen:** You need to go to the Police, Anna.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** No.

 **SnowQueen:** Please…

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** No.

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Can we not talk about this?

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** Its done. Its over. I just want to talk with you.

 **SnowQueen:** Okay… Cam?

 **Anna The Chocolatier:** No, not today. Sorry. I really dont feel up for it.

  Your heart sinks, but you feel relieved that she is still willing to talk to you. She seems okay, and despite knowing she isn’t, you know it’s best not to insist. She probably didn’t have an easy night either. You rub your face, hoping the helpless feeling fades away.

  You spend the rest of the day exchanging links to cat pictures, and it makes you realise you would probably really like to have one. You’re all alone in that house, most days, and the company would soothe you.

**SnowQueen:**  <http://sayomg.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/OMG-how-to-hold-lil-bub1.jpg>

 **SnowQueen:** I honestly can’t get enough of Lil Bub. She is so CUTE.

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

 **Anna The CatHolic:** <http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/1061evansville.com/files/2013/06/PMT3.jpg> fucking majestic

 **SnowQueen:** I think I’ll ask my father to get a cat.

 **Anna The CatHolic:** !!

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Yessssss

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Do it. Call him. Right now.

  You grin excitedly and pick up the phone. It’s 9:30 p.m. so you are pretty sure he is already out from work; regardless, you text him first, asking if you may call. He replies affirmatively.

  “Hello, Dad?”

  “Elsa, is everything alright? Did something happen?”

  “No, no, I’m fine. I'm so sorry for worrying you!”

  “As long as you’re okay, I don’t really mind. Is there something you need to talk about?”

  “Well, yes. You see…”

***

  You’re holding her in your arms. She is warm and fluffy, and her fur is completely white. She is snuggled up against your chest, purring softly. It relaxes you, and you didn’t expect to be so easily relaxed by something so small. You bury your nose in her fur and she purrs louder. You must have picked the sweetest one in the shelter.

  Well, to be truthful, she picked you, and not the other way around. As you moved along the hall, each cage had feline friends looking for a home, which was breaking your heart. You had heard a small mewl and looked to your left, where a beautiful white cat with blue eyes was staring at you. You reached out a hand and it reached out a paw. You had fallen in love on the spot.

  “I’d like to take this one.”

  “Are you sure?” The caretaker had said. “She was abandoned for being a Special Needs cat.”

  “I’m positive. She’s the one.”

  And thus, after a quick trip to the local vet, you had brought Freya home with you.

  You’re doing proper research on how to care for her, after having spent a few hours showing her the house and showing her where her litterbox and food would be. She seemed to enjoy your bed and the shelf you had emptied especially for her to sleep in (they say cats love high places, and she is no exception, it seems).

  You see an orange notification on your taskbar and open the skype window.

**Anna The CatHolic:** Was it today? Was it was it

 **Anna The CatHolic:** IM SO EXCITED

 **Anna The CatHolic:** You were out when I got home from school and you said youd be going to the shelter and you took so long, I even went to have dinner with my mom and

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Is it a boy or a girl?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I mean, not that that is all there is but I dont think cats have a conception of gender?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Anyway are they male or female?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Did you name them yet???

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Even Olaf is excited!

 **SnowQueen:** Olaf?

 **SnowQueen:** Who is Olaf?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** My bunny!

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Oh shit, I never told you about my bunny?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I need to show him to you!

  You pick up the call to see a blurred form on your screen. As it backs away, it reveals a muzzle and a bunny’s whiskers. The rabbit is white, safe for a couple of orange spots on the muzzle and along the fur.

  “This is Olaf!” Anna hugs him gleefully. “I’ve had him for four years and he loves warm hugs!”

  You giggle and smile. “He is adorable.”

  She leans back and lets the bunny sleep on her breasts. You snicker and blush slightly, wondering if she is doing it on purpose. She winks at you and grins excitedly.

  “Show me the bae!” You move the camera to show your lap.”Oh gosh, how gorgeous!”

  “Her name is Freya.”

  “That’s so pretty. Freya! Hey Freya, lookie here!” Anna gestures and you chuckle.

  “That’s not going to work.”

  “Shoosh you! Freya!”

  “No, really! She’s deaf.”

  “Oh”

  You pet Freya’s long fur and hear her purr. You scritch the underside of her jaw and she lifts her head up, with her eyes closed.

  “How do you communicate with her, then?”

  “Well” You squint at your computer screen. “From what I’ve been reading, it’s pretty easy. She’s sensitive to vibrations so I just need to tap on a surface or visually get her attention by waving or turning the lights on and off. Also not just show up out of the blue, because that might freak her out! That’s basically all there is to it.”

  “I see. That doesn’t seem too complicated.”

  “Yeah. Most Special Needs animals aren’t too complicated to deal with, people just don’t bother. Just as easily as they kick out healthy pets, they kick out these babies.” You tap on the surface of your desk and nod. Freya climbs onto it and rolls next to the computer. You adjust the camera. “See? And I’m sure she will find other ways of getting my attention if she needs anything.”

  “That’s… actually really cool.” She smooches Olaf’s head and bites his ear playfully. “Say, is it true that white cats tend to be deaf? I heard something like that in a genetics class in college, but I forgot.”

  “Hm.” You nod. “Yeah, from what I read, there is this dominant gene, that they call _W_. Being dominant, it always manifests when it’s there. _W_ has more than one effect: white fur (where the letter _W_ comes from), blue eyes, and deafness. It’s also more common for white blue-eyed cats to be deaf, rather than white cats with other eye colours. It doesn’t always happen, though, so there might be other genes involved. When it happens, it’s usually from birth.”

  “Neat. You really got your research under control.” She smiles sweetly. “You really want to be a responsible owner.”

  “Well, we have to look out for our family. And animals are family, right?”

  A small tinge of sadness shows on Anna’s eyes and you regret the familial remark. As her eyes drift to Olaf, her expression turns loving and she kisses his head again. “Yes, you’re right. I don’t know where I’d be without this bun. I’d do anything for him.” Olaf nuzzled closer to her neck.

 You look at Freya, who yawns and slowly blinks. You understand exactly what Anna means.


	9. In Which They Say The Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saturday morning. Cats. Studying for finals.

  The weight on your chest and the soft purring in your ear remind you that you did not sleep alone, as you wake up. You blink a few times to adjust to the light, raising an eyebrow at the content cat face that towers upon you.

  You consider stretching, but immediately feel like moving would be a crime; Freya looks so comfortable… You close your eyes again and groan, picking up your phone with one hand and checking your forum for overnight updates. There seems to be a commotion over Akuma no Riddle, but that doesn’t surprise you. The anime had surprised you on a positive way and, even though there were no _explicit_ lesbian interactions, the relationships were quite heavily implied and you were okay with that. You had rated it pretty high. Now you just had to work up your patience to read the manga at DynastyScans.

  You feel like there’s a lot going on, but you don’t really know where that feeling comes from. Yawning, you boop Freya’s nose and then tap at your side, so you can rise. She mewls softly and does so, and you’re grateful that the follows your commands.

  You body is a little sore from all the walking you did yesterday, carrying two bags of cat food, one on each hand. You make your way to the bathroom and wash your teeth, thinking about the assignments you need to finish by the end of the following week, which are your last, and will bring you to your much desired summer break.

  You go back to bed and go over your sketches and notes, making sure you still have everything fresh in your mind. It seems like a quiet saturday morning, and the only thing bothering you is the sheer amount of heat outside. You’ve never dealt very well with hot weather; it leaves you drowsy and wanting to enter estivation until it is cooler and more pleasant.

  After your morning study, you check your phone again, and are surprised to see a message from Anna. You check the clock to confirm it is not even noon yet, and wonder what in heavens would ever wake Anna up so early on a weekend day.

 

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Elsa, are you awake yet?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Im not feeling so well

 

  You frown. Oh no. She had never come to you like this. She did tend to tell you every detail of her life (which you appreciate, since it feels like the distance is a little smaller), but she had never come to you to vent. You assume it has something to do with her brother and are quick to reply.

 

 **SnowQueen:** I’m here.

 **SnowQueen:** What happened?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** he came home drunk again

 **Anna The CatHolic:** he didnt walk into my room, but I heard him shout at things and I think he broke a plate or something

 **Anna The CatHolic:** then he grumbled some more and fell asleep on the couch

 **SnowQueen:** Are you safe?

 **Anna The Catholic:** yeah yeah I was inside my bed the whole time

 **Anna The CatHolic:** he already left for work too

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I just didnt want to be alone right now

 

  Your veins are a mix of ice over the fact that you can offer your friend no shelter, and boiling rage over the conditions under which she lived. You take a deep breath and wonder if there are any words you can offer her.

 

 **SnowQueen:** I’m sorry, Anna.

 **SnowQueen:** I’m here, okay?

 **SnowQueen:** I like you very much.

 **Anna The CatHolic:** thank you Elsa

 **Anna The CatHolic:** thank you so much

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I like you too…

 

  Your heart skips a beat and you nearly want to smack yourself over the poor timing of it. Biting your lip, you simply go to youtube and send Anna a link to some soothing tunes. She thanks you again and tells you she will try to sleep some more, placing a virtual kiss on your cheek.

  As you put your cellphone down again, you laugh weakly at yourself. You just realised you have a crush, and probably at the worst possible timing ever. That “I like you too” had been the final needle necessary to poke through your denial, and now you’re just left with that quiet realisation of O _h I have a crush…_ You feel like it doesn’t make things necessarily more complicated, but it reflects in the way you care about Anna, and how helpless you feel in the midst of all this.

  You find comfort in the fact that Anna is asleep and her brother out of the house, and decide to study some more, waiting for her to wake up. You know her well enough to know she would be recovered by then (she has proven to you how resilient she is), and you have a feeling that the afternoon will be much better.

 

***

 

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Yoo-hoo~

 **SnowQueen:** Really? Is that how you’re greeting me, now? /chuckle

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Im in a good mood.

 **Anna The CatHolic:** thank you so much, Elsa  <3

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Im so glad you were there and Im so sorry for pushing all this onto you

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I wish I didnt

 **SnowQueen:** It’s all right. I really don’t mind.

 **SnowQueen:** We’re here for each other, right? If you can handle my anxiety attacks, I can handle this.

 **Anna The CatHolic:** heh

 **Anna The CatHolic:** signing up on that forum was the best thing I ever did

 **SnowQueen:** I’m glad you signed up too.

 

  You can feel your cheeks burn softly, and you smile, looking at the screen. As you predicted, Anna was feeling better, and you really feel like you did something good for her. Perhaps you’re not such a bad friend after all.

  By now, you’re not sure if the word _friend_ warms your heart or makes it sting. You know it’s too early to think about that, but you’ve known Anna for a year, and you’ve become so close and you’ve been dismissing your obvious crush for so long that it leaves you a bit uneasy. You don’t know if you should tell her - all right, rewind, you’re too shy to do something like that. It seems perfectly reasonable to panic until she says something about feelings.

 

 **Anna The CatHolic:** by the way

 **Anna The CatHolic:** all this got me thinking

 **Anna The CatHolic:** well, the truth is that while everything with… with my brother was happening, all I could think about was you

 **Anna The CatHolic:** like

 **Anna The CatHolic:** not only how I knew youd help me if you could

 **Anna The CatHolic:** but also just you

 

  You try to dismiss it. You _try_. You’re failing spectacularly.

 

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I think I like you

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I think I /like/ like you

 

  Your mind sounds something similar to a fire alarm and your stomach feels like it’s about to burst with confused butterflies flying in every direction. Everything is happening so fast you don't even have time to panic.

 

 **Anna The CatHolic:** shit I hope this is okay?

 **Anna The CatHolic:** I totally get it if its not mutual I mean

 **Anna The CatHolic:** boy, do I have a tendency to crush on straight girls

 **Anna The CatHolic:** so as long as we can be friends

 **SnowQueen:** Anna

 **Anna The CatHolic:** Im perfectly fine

 **SnowQueen:** Anna

 

  Your fingers move on their own as the words leave your lips by reflex.

  
**SnowQueen:** I like you too.


	10. In Which- Oh to hell with that, have your fluff.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These girls are unbelieveably gay. Sweet Maker.

  Oh man. Oh dear. You… you have _girlfriend_.

  You had spent part of your night staring at the ceiling, deciding to work on your assignments since you knew you were too excited to be able to sleep. You managed to finish both of them, putting them in your portfolio and snoozing for a little bit after six in the morning. You wake up a little past two pm and rub your eyes. Your hair is a tangled mess, so you get up and walk to the bathroom to brush and braid it. The chore takes you almost ten minutes (you have a lot of hair, it seems), and all the while Freya watches you attentively, sitting on top of the toilet. You pet her and head for the kitchen, not feeling like making a real meal. You fetch your smartphone and check your skype for Anna, but she doesn’t seem to be online, yet.

  You boil your ramen and prepare your bowl, using the waiting time to put your dirty laundry in the washing machine. As you return, your phone is buzzing and you have to get a grip on yourself to turn off the stove before checking your messages.

**Princess Anna:** Hi hi hi!

 **Princess Anna:** Wanna cam?

 **SnowQueen:** Sure. Give me a moment, okay?

  You prepare everything and set your phone in front of you.

**SnowQueen:** You don’t mind if I’m eating, do you?

  Her only reply is to start a call, which you pick up.

  Before you know, you’re choking on noodles and trying to shake the blush out of your face. Anna stood before you wearing nothing but a bra. She fanned herself using a magazine and held a popsicle on her other hand. When your camera turned on, her smile widened, but it was quickly replaced by an expression of confusion.

  “Uh, Elsa, are you okay?”

  You nod and try to breathe normally again, coughing the noodles out of your lungs and swallowing them. Anna is still eyeing you suspiciously, so you sigh and decide to be upfront about it. “I just didn’t expect you to be… so undressed.”

  Anna looks down at herself. “Ugh, it’s just this horrible heat and-” She stopped on her tracks. “Holy shit you’re my girlfriend, this is totally getting to you.” She gestures frantically. “Well, this wouldn’t be a big deal, but since we’re dating there’s the implication of sex- I think? I’m not asexual and you never came out as such. Are you asexual?”

  “N-no.”

  “So, yeah, given we both pretty much assume we will, one day, get close like that _oh my god this is embarrassing_.”

  “Wait.” Your heart is pulsing in your throat, and your stomach is fluttering. “You’re right. We’re dating. We’re going to uh, yeah, m-make love, so we shouldn’t worry about this.”

  Anna’s eyes widen. “Oh my Gods, did you just say _make love_? Oh Jesus.” Her face reddens even more. “I could kiss you right now.”

_Why is this happening on camera, I am going to DIE._

  Before you can attempt another sentence, your partner leans back on her chair and starts laughing loudly.

  Realising the silliness of the situation, you slowly begin to cackle, letting the laughter wash away your embarrassment. By the time you’re both done, you’re looking at each other with a smile.

  “Well… I feel a little overdressed, now.”

  Her smile turns into a smirk. “That can be solved really easily.”

  “Hm, I don’t think I’m comfortable with it, just yet.” You hug yourself, fearing to make her upset by your refusal.

  “That’s okay. Just do whatever makes you comfortable.” She slurps on her popsicle, which had started to melt as you two were speaking. “I’m just really hot.”

  “Pun intended.” You chuckle shily.

  “See? You’re already getting the hang of flirting.”

  You cough and straighten your back. “Of course.” You try to remain serious, but end up laughing once more, covering your mouth. Anna simply shakes her head with a sweet smile.

  Your heart is still racing and, even though you want to say something, it seems like you can’t speak. You’ve seen pictures of Anna in a bikini as her Skype icon before, but seeing her talking to you clad in underwear, eyes shining as her enthusiasm grows, is a sight you weren’t ready for. The thought that something simultaneously so wonderful and cute (Goodness Heavens, **Freckled Cutie** was such an accurate description) was smiling that way just for you is almost inconceivable.

  You’re somewhat relieved to see she is wearing a sports’ bra, since you think you would be likely to pass out if you got to see even more of her. The lighting gives her skin a pearly sheen, her freckles almost unnoticeable where the sun’s rays hit them directly.

   You yawn and pull a book out of your shelf, deciding you are comfortable enough to just do your thing while she does her thing. At least, you hope she is okay with that, since you really need a time out after all that embarrassment.

  “Yo, babe, you mind if I study a little bit? I have a Anatomy and Physiology exam next week.” Her voice shifts your glance back to your cellphone.

  “Did you just call me ‘babe’?” You snicker.

  “Oh, gods, please don’t.” She laughs. “I’ve never done the GF thing before. I have the right to use corny petnames.”

  You chuckle. “Sure, _babe_ , be my guest. Let me just turn the call off and call you again from my laptop. I’d be really happy to enjoy your company.”

  She pouts and sticks her tongue out. You smile. Apparently she also feels comfortable just spending time with you, and that is completely fine.

  You put your dirty ramen bowl in the sink and turn your laptop on, as each second it takes to load seems to last forever. When Skype finally opens, you call her.

  “Welcome back, Snow Queen.”

  “Hello, Cute-One-With-Freckles.”

  “Oh my god.”

  “Yes, dear?”

  “Nothing. You’re too cute.”

  “Lies.”

  “Okay, seriously, I have to tackle this subject for a while.” She smiles and pulls out a large textbook. “Don’t even ask.”

  You shake your head. “I wouldn’t dare, Nurse Anna.”

  You immerse yourself in your volume of _Pride and Prejudice_ , which you are probably reading for the tenth time, pleased by the background noise of Anna scribbling notes on paper with a pencil. She talks to herself as she does it, grumbling science things you don’t really know.

  You spend the afternoon in each other’s company, with small remarks interrupting your book or Anna’s study. You remind her to eat, which is something she often forgets - you’ve learned she is pretty terrible at taking care of herself, but you do enjoy making sure she is all right. She also seems to enjoy it, and you wonder if someone had ever had the trouble of looking after her. You’ve read that people living in abused households often subconsciously do not feel worthy of self-care, and assume that might be Anna’s case.

  As night falls and you both have classes, you put your book down and flash a tender smile at your companion.

  “I wish I never had to turn the webcam off.” She says in a low tone.

  “Yeah… me too.”

  “But we’ll talk tomorrow, right? I mean, I don’t want to be clingy but…”

  You shake your head. “No, please. Talk to me.”

  “Okay.” She’s whispering, now. “Goodnight, Elsa.”

  “Yeah… Goodnight, Anna.”

  She seems about to say something, but bites her lip. Her eyes are shining brightly and her expression softens. You want to say it too.

  You turn the call off and go to bed.

  You have a girlfriend. And it’s _amazing_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh. Depression again. Also, since there is no plot point, here, I had a hard time deciding what kind of fluff I could include here. Especially since they are not together physically.  
> My deepest apologies for the delay, please enjoy this new chapter. Hopefully more timely updates will ensue.  
> (I'm working on a LiS Pricefield fic at the same time, so Goddess knows what I'm doing to myself - so many ships, so little time.)


	11. In Which Announcements Are Made

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chapter full of new things.

   “We decided to get engaged.”

   You raise your eyes from your phone and turn your face to look at your father. His cheeks are bright red, nearly masking the auburn hairs of his moustache, his bright blue eyes are turned to you, and his lips are pouting like a child’s after they’ve been caught doing something they shouldn’t be doing.

   You stare wordlessly, not quite sure of how to react to the news. You’re not exactly surprised - people seem to marry and re-marry really easily, these days -, but your father’s unease catches you off-guard; it’s frankly adorable.

   Arthur gets up, pacing the room and fidgeting with his hands in his pockets. “You see, we get along really well and… Good God, she really makes my heart beat funny! I had dedicated myself to work and to you and... “ He bites his lip. “Goodness, she is such a strong woman and we have such in-depth conversations about our field of work - do you know how hard it is to find someone who actually  _ knows _ what they’re doing?”

   “I can only imagine.”

   There is a childish shine in Arthur’s eyes, as he explains all sorts of concepts, completely foreign to his daughter, but easily understood and put in practice by his lover.

   After twenty minutes of gesturing and happy rambling, you finally get that her name is Ithun and she is of european descent.

   “Of course I wouldn’t decide this behind your back, I mean, I want to know if you accept this-” As he speaks, you get up and wrap your arms around him. He stops on his tracks and looks down at you before returning the hug.

   “Am I making you anxious? I can call it off.”

   You squeeze him. “No, it’s not that. I’ve never seen you this happy and I don’t know what to do.”

   He ruffles your hair affectionately and kisses the top of your head. “Honey…”

   Swallowing dryly, you bury your head in his chest. “I love you, dad.”

   “I love you too, sweetheart. I worry so much.”

  “I know.” You chuckle. “We’ve had this conversation before.” You tap his forehead. “With all this jazz, you might as well had better brought her here to ask for your hand in marriage. You make it sound like she has to earn my blessing, or something.”

   “You’re my daughter.” He becomes serious. “Your well-being is my priority and I will do anything I have to to ensure it.”

   “I know, dad. I’d never doubt that. Now, however, I have to sleep.” You kiss his clean-shaven cheek. “Good night, Papa.”

   You hug him one last time, exhausted and eager to go to bed, as Anna had gone to sleep already. You take your sleeping pill (unnecessary, at this point) and send her a selfie with your face buried on your pillow, before falling soundly asleep.

 

***

 

  “Dang, your dad went from 'father' to 'Daddy' in the blink of an eye.”

  “Please don’t.” You snort and roll your eyes.

  “It’s fine, I know the feel.” Anna waves dismissively at her webcam. “At least you don’t have to deal with your mom’s boyfriend spending the night, all the time. And my brother is being positively gross about it.” Your grimace is enough of a sign that it was okay for Anna to proceed. “He acts like the most perfect and charming of ass-kissers. I swear that my stepdad’s ass must be as polished as a christmas ornament."

  “So he hasn’t been drinking?”

  “Of course he has.” Anna stiffens and checks her bedroom door, as if your words could have somehow escaped her headset and reached her sibling’s ears.

 

**Anna The CatHolic:** He drinks when mom is out.

**SnowQueen:** How often is that?

**Anna The CatHolic:** Often.

**Anna The CatHolic:** Lets change the subject pls.

 

  You sigh and nod. Anna checks her phone and laughs, before turning it to you until you see the picture of a kitten all blurred out on your computer screen.

  “Say, do you have Snapchat?”

  “Not really. Should I?” You blink. “I don’t really have any friends or anyone who’d send me anything.”

  As Anna’s face lights up, you don’t even know if you should be scared or excited. “YOU MUST INSTALL IT.”

  “With that kind of enthusiasm, I’d fear for my safety if I didn’t.”

  “Oh, silly, don’t you want me to send you nudes?”

  “Haha… Wait what?” You blush deeply. “Are you serious? I mean, sure, okay, I guess I’d be uh… very okay with that.”

  Anna’s jaw drops. “S-shit, really? O-okay.”

  “YOU DON’T HAVE TO.”

  “I WANT TO.”

  Awkward silence.

  Freya leaps on your desk, licking her paw in an almost mocking way. Your girlfriend stares at you quietly, her face a flushed mess. You’re not innocent. You’re 19 and your sexual awakening had been a long time ago. Anna definitely attracts you, and you know the attraction is mutual. You had low-key spoken about it very honestly, but had never mentioned  _ doing anything about it _ , in fear of scaring her off.

 

**SnowQueen:** It would be easier if I could just kiss you.

**SnowQueen:** We would make out and everything would happen naturally.

**SnowQueen:** I want it to, but I don’t know how to start. Not from here. From so far away.

 

  You smile quietly.

 

**SnowQueen:** I really like you… Physically, too.

 

  Anna’s silence is freaking you out and your heart is beating right off your chest. Your leg is bouncing nervously as you avert your eyes from the screen.

 

_ Anna The CatHolic is typing… _

 

**Anna The CatHolic:** I know…

**Anna The CatHolic:** Me too.

**Anna The CatHolic:** I want to kiss you. Wrap my arms around you and kiss your neck.

**Anna The CatHolic:** I wonder what youd sound like if I did. I bet youd sound really cute...

 

  Her face is bright red as she types, her eyes hidden under her fringe. She hugs herself when she’s done. You can tell she’s panicking from your lack of reaction, but you’re so overwhelmed with feelings that you cannot formulate a response just yet. Your breath shortens and your entire body feels warm, and you are aware that, were she in front of you, you would take her in your arms and let your lust run free.

  “Anna, I love you.”

  The words leave your lips before you notice them, perhaps even before you have time to think them.

  You want to run your hand down your thighs and set It where fluids are pooling in your underwear. You stare at the screen wordlessly.

_ Anna The CatHolic is typing… _

 

   She looks at you with her eyes wide and dark with desire.

 

**Anna The CatHolic** : Are you alone at home?

**SnowQueen:** Yes.

 

   And despite all the perfectly shaped fractals you have been shown and created in class, you can swear her body is the most beautiful thing you have ever seen in your entire life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you ask, no, I hadn't planned this. It just flowed in this direction.

**Author's Note:**

> naesnark.tumblr.com


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